Agony

I saw you again today.
Not much went on between us.
Maybe just a "hi" and a "bye"
with a gentle touch here and there.
We may have exchanged other words too
but not as much as I would've liked.
It's true...
I shy away from talking to you.
I wait for you to make the first move.
But it's a need,
not greed.
I realize that I can no longer
live in this agony,
this agony I feel for you.
I know you'll never feel for me
the same way I feel for you.
You may not find me attractive at all,
or,
you may already have someone else,
or desire someone other than me.
So, I tell myself
I will stop agonizing
over someone who does not
agonize over me.
Even though I hope and pray
that one day
you will fall in love with me,
I realize you won't
and I should just give up,
and stop breaking my own heart
over and over again for a lost cause.